Happy New Year

Another 12 months to become the person we know deep down inside we are.Or for the already perfect....Umm become more perfect? To share laughter with new people. To travel to new places. to do more good than bad. To appreciate even the smallest,most minute things.

A whole new year!

I wish you all the best!

Happy new year

what will your son do

I know its hard as hell

everything seems to be working against you

But your killing yourself

who will take care of your son?

Why is a Christmas tree better than a man? humour}

Why is a Christmas tree better than a man?

It's always erect,
Stays up for 12 days and nights,
Has cute balls,
And even looks good with the lights on!

It's always erect,
Stays up for 12 days and nights,
Has cute balls,
And even looks good with the lights on!

an old lady [humour]

An old lady was standing at the rail of the cruise ship holding her hat so that the wind wouldn't blow it away. A gentleman approached her & said, 'Pardon me, madam, I do not intend to be forward but did you know that your dress is blowing up in this wind?' 'Yes, I know,' said the lady. 'But I need my hands to hold onto my hat.' 'But madam, he said, 'you must know that you're derriere is exposed!' \ The woman looked down, then back up at the man and said, 'Sir, anything you see down there is 85 years old, but I just bought this hat!'

What new years means to me, hangups and random early evening musings from my soul

I dont like to party on new Years eve. Not because Im religious or even conservative. That would be a great excuse if not for so awful a lie.

I dont like partying because when my parents were alive I never wanted to die on the streets and I never wanted to start the year off drinking and partying. The old people use to say "The way you briong in the new year is the way you will live it"

a cliche? Sure but it always gave me pause for thought. Ive left amny places on new years eve about 11:30 so that im home. Some years I stayed home alone.

Im kool with that. It works for me.

Other oddities i never wanted to be in bed with a stranger on New years Eve. Sounds weird but at 18 i was very promiscouous. I just had sex because their was lack of anything else to do and I guess at that age that was my thing. Didnt fall in love and couldnt remember the folks name 5 minutes after the final curtain came down. wasnt hott on encores either...damn I was sort of a hoe.

What made me stop that was one new years eve I met somebody and the fucker tried to strangle me. Not kill me some sort of perverse pleasure. So ended my damn days of living la vida loca. I laugh now but I remember quoting the 23rd psalm. Funny how sinners get right religious when looking death in the eye huh?

thinking of that...I can remember when I have prayed. Once someone was chasing me with a gun cause I looked like someone that had beat them for dope or money and the fucker was sure it was me! The whole time I was running I was praying to God.

My nana use to laugh when I told her my prayer. its sort of like this " Lord damn i know I dont ever pray or go to church but please forgive me for any sins I have comitted and please hear my prayer" I would be dead serious too. Im catholic true but I have no time to Confer with the blessed Virgin when I need her son with the quickness!

But I did use to pray for my nana that outlive her so she would not be in this world alone. God answered that prayer and though im not religious or anything like that. Everyday I thank God for answering the praer that I put both my loved ones in the grave before I went. Biut me being me I always say that doesnt mean Im ready to go...I laugh afeter and its a good thing.

Truish is throwing a party and she wants me their and I really do not want to start my year off with that. Im a fall and winter drinker never drink in the summer I hate the feeling with the heat. But I dont like to do stuff like that when its a new year.

12 months to become a better person cause I know I have fucked up ways sometimes. I dont alweays deal with people the way I would want them to deal with me. Probbly because ive met alot of bullshitters. I havent been heartbroken but when I feel someone has tried to play me or think they can get over. I havent reached the maturity point where I can walk away. I usually end up slapping them or jumping them or some other childish stuff.

probbly becaue i dont argue well. Im very humble to most people because thats just me. I dont try to offend anyone. Some times ppls see that as weakness specially in the streets. When its word to word once I rerach the point where I cant talk I stutter badly when im very mad then I swing and its something I have worked hard as hell to control because it got me 2 years as a juvenile. Then when I got there I got 16 months for assult and im not a good fighter its more im scred of someone scarring me or something.

So I have reached a very good point I read my old blogs for the last year and a half where I had diffrent confrontations etyc and I see the growth and Im pleased.

I want to comtinue having more self control. Even of my the things I say because wiords cut deep plus their the gas to most physical fires. I tell gabe this as I never argue with him I really just say this is how i feel. Please respect it but I cant go back and forth just let me hear what you think and i will do the same. It took awhile for him to catch it but now its made our home better and we are able to talk more even about explosive things. Its made it a safe place.

Life is the longest thing we have to do on this earth. I dont know WTF people say "Life is too short for this or that" To me thats BS. Life is the longerst thing I have ever done and will do. I like the negative so im young enough to deal with it. That way shit wont come up during my mid life crisis.

a lot of men internalize everything. They dont talk well to strangers they do but they ignore alot till it builds up. Some of them get high blood pressure. When I was working as a QDDP I got high blood pressure i was like WTF but i was just letting everything sklide and trying to just keep the peace. I was so misreable

I had stomich aches and as a kid I was the same way. I even have trouble saying I love you verbally. Im not a talk love type person.

I remember I dated this girl in 7th grade and I liked her so much and I fell in puppy love with her that I bought her a 50 dollar bottle of Chanel #5 but i couldnt say it

my father wasnt big on that I use to tell him i hated him lol which i didnt but it would get his attention its the only time i ever saw him cry. But I loved him.

Even now i make myself say it because even though I feel it I have this hang up that it makes you look weak as hell and ill get played and thats soooo not true. So I knock myself out doouing things that show them I am thinking of them and care for them but one day G said u never say alot but i know. But I try to say it.

hang ups are hard.

Some people have a fucking answer for everything but I doint because I dont understand most things. I have to sit on things for months sometimes and turn em over b4 im cool with it.

I dont plan to go back to catholic church this year. Its a rule that you have to make confession at least once a year but you know what I dont belive that rule cuz i never read it in the bible. But I do pray and between me and God hell judge me on judgement day cuz he knows my heart anyway.

my heart is so heavy right now cause my father died christmas of 2005 but i know i asked god to take him b4 me and nana left 2008 in april and sometimes i really feel like why am i just here just waiting to die? Why do I have to go thru this shit everyday? Theres no one that needs me like that. Thats dumb thinking but in my solitude time it hits me and changes my whole aura.

Its easy to remember but hard to forget. i use to hear that song as a kid and now I understand what Billie Holiday sang about. I thoiught it was just a love sone but its not. Its so easy to remember things that tear us or make us and its hard to forget.

Sort of like forgive and forget. I need to forgive some people and its eating me becaue I wont...Not cant just wont. I hear the tv minister say when i do ill be free. hell I guess ill be a slave cause I hold the longest grudges but im working on it.

im ttired of typing...

I hear you whisper....illl laways love you and though it brings me regret...Irts easy to remember but oooh so hard to forget.......

Entrepernurship has its pluses and minuses

Some of the customers i have in my homebased bussiness. Make me wonder. We have a little small computer repair service. The things people call for you to do make u wonder.

Most of the bussiness comes from word of mouth. Im thankful and humble. But it gets where when u go to hang people want to try and talk about computers. Hoping for free advice which is cool but after a while its a drag. Specially when they havent spent a dime with you.

But i always say you gotta be pleasant as thats where a great referral may com from. im off from work and with everything so helplessy tight i was thankful for the new work and new people.

I liked consignment better. But rents are so high a few slow months will kill you. I dont think we did more that break even on that. so something from the home cuts a lot of overhead. Just now with chulo coming where will we work.

Oh well im thankful however. Things could be worse.

It takes a minute to build up a client base. I want to do basic computer instruction on the weekends. But the thought of people in the home isnt appealing. So i came up with for everyone one family member they can bring one. That way i dont have to deal with that.

So im going to take some more courses so i can learn alot more. Got help me if someone wants to learn code I really have to learn how to do it cause I just steal codes and use em. Plus Im not creative like that.Some people are very creative. I wish me luck where ill find the time is beyond me.

Another day.. I want to chill tonight and download some tunes but my ipod is at Jamals. At least itll be their when i get back if his daughters dont dogg it. LOL Hell probbly put it up.

Oh shit! is all I can say

Man o man O man O man. Today was kewl. 2 Kewl. Even though my partner went home 4 x mas I was cool.
I just expected it to be another day.
I read blogs and am quick to judge but after today NEVER AGAIN word 2 da universe.
I had a few guests all good. then I took patrick outside I bent down to fix his leash when I looked up I looked at the prettiest light skin jamacian brother I have ever seen.
I just looked cuz I knew I knew him so he called me by my government name and said merry christmas and we hung out all afternoon and I swear I see how easy no matter how much you say u love your mate u could have an affair. we got to that point after politics. and loss of his family and all that that the elephant sits in the room.
I couldn't even look at him.
u know how u can tell someone is waiting for you to open the door? I wouldn't because word 2 the universe I love my BF and ill tell him when he comes back but I see how easy it is now it just takes the right one to come along. if your not on point u can slip and bust yo head. to keep it 100% real I was actually horny as hell when I just looked at him I had not felt that particular brand of horny since high school days walking sonya J home. the I don't know what 2 do about this type horny. shit what a christmas and I let ol boy in but I gotta say. I was a trooper I didn't fall but now ill watch how I judge people. cuz everybody can't get under your skin and in your head. but if you let a person make lov to your mind ur doomed.
I have climbed another ladder before years end its all good

BORED

there were 2 female impersonators at the party. neither one looked like a girl. dex said they were undercover secret service. that was funny.
they were cool tho. I had three drinks and went and looked if they looked any realer. no luck
their was a chick that did look like a guy tho.
I have to stop drinking I was laffing at a thought I had what if a gay guy that looked like a girl and the girl who looked like the boy got drunk and decided to have a one night stand and they're kissing and he reaches for her crotch thinking to feel something hell be a searching azz. I knew I had 2 be high as hell cuz I was literally having a freakish dirty fantasy.
Gabe has gone home for christmas I know I'm not lonely that fast. I was like ashamed of my thoughts. I could literally see it I was kinda laughing the big transvestite told me I was a cutie and I almost sprayed my drink laffing her/his voice was so deep I sounded like a bitch! I gotta stop drinking I swaer I need a new poison.
I was thinking last thing I would want to do is wake uo to the likes of that I sobered up fast at that fantasy.
its all good tho I like cross dressers male and female as long as they can fool at least 3 out of every 5 ppl. lol I'm crazy I'm home alone for 4 days I'M BOOOOORRRED ooooh thy robbed M I wonder whose doing those robberies? wallets every morning be out under cars this is like supoose to be working class crown heights but with the layoffs crime and drugs are already taken over and they robbin young cats.
not good.

random memories and west coast shit

Damn I love Birdman his raps just make me feel good. I be dancin around feelin good when I hear him spit. I CAN'T get into Kanye at all. like someone needs to tell him he's just an entertainer. I'm no 50 fan either but Birdman and lil jeezy I get into them even at home. I feel like I'm riding when I hear their stuff. weird cuz I'm not really a head at all. Man I was checkin somebodys page out dat has sent me a invitation. being I haven't been 2 bed I am brain dead I be leaving braincells all over crown heights.
but he had that West Coast Music that I use to be so addicted to.
Back in da day DJ Quick was my favorite rapper I had all his cassettes and CDs I was running with this crazy crip kid. I can't remember his name he went crazy in 2001 and got on the F train and was robbing and cutting people up he was on the news and everything I think he smoked a tree that was laced with something. some people said he was a crackhead. Darnell was his name. Donell that's it
its not funny but when someone told me I said damn ol boy climbed that tree and never came down.
I can't remember his name but he use to get me all the good rap I liked Spice 1 back then he had this song called 'in my neighborhood' and Quck I like their music 4 the beats they love that old skool funkedelic type shit.
I had a ol skool record by the Brides of Funkenstein' I got it at a garage sale it was called 'never buy a bridge in brooklyn' it was the funkiest album I had ever heard even tho it was mad old. my favorite song was called 'up in here' something about a party up in heah, I use to play that record to death. never saw anything else by them but that how I learned about funk.
I wasn't a big fan but those OGs would talk about George Clinton and the mothership and I would try to imagine it.
when the internet we got I looked it up that was some wild music and people. everybody over 50 got a mothership concert story I like them storys.
Smokey taught me bout doo wop and three and four part harmony. they would be at the barbershop. I use to sweep the floor at the barbershop when I was a kid. Barbershops were better back when I was like 10 you'd hear a lot about everything. I learned about the clap at age 10 lol. this guy use to always get it and hed be pissed as hell hed come in talking smack about they had to put something a swab or whatever in his johnson (thats what he called it) I didn't know what a johnson was and I'd go ask Nana and shed be pissed said I was hearing too much.
good memories damn!
There was a store nearest our place that sold records. but it was really a weed spot. my naïve ass use to go there and they'd sell me a 45 for 35 cents that was cheap in the 1980s too cheap.
so one day a customer come in and bought a trey bag and I didn't know what a tre bag was, I went home and asked what type of record was a tre?
that ended my trips To the record store but like a week later or so the police raided e m
don't seem like shit was better then its more it was knew and exciting.
I met claw when I was real young. he was a legend he was a old herion addict that stayed in my aunts building. legend had it they wanted his arm for research he was all ulcered up a big blob with ulcers from shooting drugs. My uncle was an addict he died of hepititus c back in the 90s so I got to see some wild stuff as a kid.
the world has changed sadder even with all the sadness in the 80S ppl still were closer. oh well just some random memories
someone noticed I hardly ever listen to men singers. I don't know why I just could not sleep with some guy singing it doesn't sooth me. that is weird. I love female singers as long as they don't hit crazy notes and stuff I get real aggie.

random memories and west coast shit

Man I was checkin somebodys page out dat ha sent me a invitation. being I haven't been 2 bed I am brain dead I be leaving braincells all over crown heights.
but he had that West Coast Music that I use to be so addicted to.
Back in da day DJ Quick was my favorite rapper I had all his cassettes and CDs I was running with this crazy crip kid. I can't remember his name he went crazy in 2001 and got on the F train and was robbing and cutting people up he was on the news and everything I think he smoked a tree that was laced with something. some people said he was a crackhead. Darnell was his name. Donell that's it
its not funny but when someone told me I said damn ol boy climbed that tree and never came down.
I can't remember his name but he use to get me all the good rap I liked Spice 1 back then he had this song called 'in my neighborhood' and Quck I like their music 4 the beats they love that old skool funkedelic type shit.
I had a ol skool record by the Brides of Funkenstein' I got it at a garage sale it was called 'never buy a bridge in brooklyn' it was the funkiest album I had ever heard even tho it was mad old. my favorite song was called 'up in here' something about a party up in heah, I use to play that record to death. never saw anything else by them but that how I learned about funk.
I wasn't a big fan but those OGs would talk about George Clinton and the mothership and I would try to imagine it.
when the internet we got I looked it up that was some wild music and people. everybody over 50 got a mothership concert story I like them storys.
Smokey taught me bout doo wop and three and four part harmony. they would be at the barbershop. I use to sweep the floor at the barbershop when I was a kid. Barbershops were better back when I was like 10 you'd hear a lot about everything. I learned about the clap at age 10 lol. this guy use to always get it and hed be pissed as hell hed come in talking smack about they had to put something a swab or whatever in his johnson (thats what he called it) I didn't know what a johnson was and I'd go ask Nana and shed be pissed said I was hearing too much.
good memories damn!
There was a store nearest our place that sold records. but it was really a weed spot. my naïve ass use to go there and they'd sell me a 45 for 35 cents that was cheap in the 1980s too cheap.
so one day a customer come in and bought a trey bag and I didn't know what a tre bag was, I went home and asked what type of record was a tre?
that ended my trips To the record store but like a week later or so the police raided e m
don't seem like shit was better then its more it was knew and exciting.
I met claw when I was real young. he was a legend he was a old herion addict that stayed in my aunts building. legend had it they wanted his arm for research he was all ulcered up a big blob with ulcers from shooting drugs. My uncle was an addict he died of hepititus c back in the 90s so I got to see some wild stuff as a kid.
the world has changed sadder even with all the sadness in the 80S ppl still were closer. oh well just some random memories
someone noticed I hardly ever listen to men singers. I don't know why I just could not sleep with some guy singing it doesn't sooth me. that is weird. I love female singers as long as they don't hit crazy notes and stuff I get real aggie.

5~AM

wasn't their a joint called 5 o'clock by Bahamadia or somebody back in da day? someone made a joint about 5~am.
draggin in from chillin I'm off this week that's cool.
xmas right around the corner.
not feelin it this year at all. just not caught up in all the hype and BS.
that's a sign of maturity tho when u can just say. Its another day. Most of the gifts I bought I'm keepin 4 myself...Merry christmas to Jah!
I blogged about how hippy hippy yi yay I was to be in touch with my 2nd cousin. shit dat nukka 2 needy be blowin up my phone. I knew hed ask 4 something anytime someone calls u every 5 minutes and u don answer they want dinero.Wonder why I think like that. PPl do be gamin and I can smell game I really can.
I just don't have it 2 be giving away.
trickin aint easy is all I can say.
he's cool but damn give a brother a chance to marinate in the glow of us meeting 4 u try to gank me. makes me think he smokin or somethin. .
saw lay tonight I tole my friend that's a ok brother. Me and him was talkin some real shit. Life is really no joke. Mother fuckers can try to breeze thru if they wanna. Livin? that's serious business. He really pulled my coat to some peeps I be dabblin with. I respect that. cuz sometimes I don trust my own inner voice but when you audibly hear what your inner self has already said.
u know u gotta shut it down.
that's why u really gotta know your self. that to me is the best knowledge u can posess.
I use to not like him but that's cuz he was with some ppls that I didn't feel so I lumped them all 2gether.
they say bird of a feather flock 2gether but that's cliché.
shit, I hang with a lot of birds but we all be on some different things,programs etc
Only common ground is we all are tryin to make it. Take different roads ya know.
imm read all my old blogs this week to see in my writing and thinking pattern am I progressing. seeing reality more clear I think I am but when u read your old stuff u be like damn I was thinking like that???I read some blogs from 2006 and was like reading someone elses shit. I'm so far from who I was then
but see I read this book and the chick was interviewing some violinist and she was gushing Oh pablo everytime u play it its different.
and he said nature is so and we are nature.
so I respect I can never be who I was. not even a minute ago! aint that something we can't even copy ourselves so how can we copy anybody else and come out of it with something?? I like that thought pattern...I'm good now..

Whatever happened to the kids from "our gang" (interesting TV history)

Remember Our Gang ???


What ever happened to those people?

In case you forgot who is who.

Well, here it is...
The Our Gang Curse !!
Alfalfa --

Carl Switzer was shot to death at age 31.
Chubby --

300-pound Norman Chaney died at age 22 following an operation.
Buckwheat --
William Thomas died at age 49 of a heart attack.
Darla Hood --

The Our Gang leading lady contracted hepatitis and died at age 47.
Brisbane --

Kendall McCormas, known as Breezy Brisbane, committed suicide at age 64.
Frogg y --

William Robert Laughline was killed in a motor scooter accident at age 16.
Mickey Daniels --

He died of liver disease at 55.
Stymie --

Mathew Bear led a life of crime and drugs. He died of a stroke at age 56.
Scotty Beckett --

He died at age 38 following a brutal beating.
Wheezer - -

Robert Hutchins was killed in an airplane accident at age 19.
Pete the Pup --

He was poisoned by an unknown assailant.

New Ohio Roller Coaster (repost)

NEW OHIO ROLLER COASTER

WOULD ANYONE LIKE TO TAKE A TRIP TO OHIO?

Yep, enough said!

reposted fUnnIes

reposted cartoons 1

dang I had to repost these. wouldnt post from my cell...oh well

Christmas

Gabes family is going to Panama for Christmas. I could go if they had told me in advance sooo I guess they didn't want me 2 come not asking me at the last minute. POPPI says the tickets were a last minute blessing and he wants to see his sisters. I believe him but why do I feel that he doesn't really want me 2 come? Gabe wants to be on my side and say he shouldn't go but damn I've worked 2 hard to make our lives and families co exsist. a I'm too tired to fight anymore. Ill spend X mas with the dog and maybe friends. I met my cousin thanksgiving and I've igged all his calls he's to damn needy 4 me. that sounds bitchy as hell but I just don't care for my fathers side of the family they are southerners and alright but I'm just at some sort of crossroads. don't wanna be bothered.
I wish I could say I feel bad but I really don't. I'm just over it all. I read somewhere where u gotta be content with yourself 2 co exsist with others.

I really want to get some good music. I'm not into those messagy songs. People take life so damn serious sometimes makes me wanna take their life. damn that sounds fucked up.

I'm gonna come up with some ideas for my home business I'm not making much extra money on my home computer repair business at all. I see those commercials where these entrepernurs make 5k a month if I make 500 I'd be doing good. This recession is killing my azz.

I don't even want to be rich I just wanna be able to blow money without feeling guilty.

I met a nice guy on Yahoo a buddy 4 whatever the hell that's worth. who digs music but somethings wrong with him in his head cuz anytime I read an email and get aggie somethings not right. He is one of those people if he lived next door I'd hate. That's sooo funny but true

I'm off all this week. imma pack gabes suitcase. I think I'm pissed at this shit. I have absolutely nothing to do this xmas!!! and no one 2 do it with!!! nothing!!! I called Trish and she wants to hang New Years Eve but I am not a new years eve person.

oh well. I see how this years gonna end and 09 is gonna start. so be it.

I will have to acess my feelings because lately I haven't been to happy.

From My Cell Phone Funny cartoons

Friends send the damndest, funniest shit to your cell phone. I had to share while cleaning out my phones email

From the other Pat:

I

From Jimmy:

WHERE DO RED-HEADED BABIES COME FROM????? After their baby was born, the panicked father went to see the Obstetrician. 'Doctor,' the man said, 'I don't mind telling you, but I'm a little upset because my daughter has red hair. She can't possibly be mine!!' 'Nonsense,' the doctor said'. 'Even though you and your wife both have black hair, one of your ancestors may have contributed red hair to the gene pool.' 'It isn't possible,' the man insisted '!?!? 'This can't be, our families on both sides had jet-black hair for generations.' 'Well,' said the doctor, 'let me ask you this. How often do you have sex??? ' The man seemed a bit ashamed . 'I've been working very hard for the past year. We only made love once or twice every few months.' 'Well, there you have it!' The doctor said confidently. 'It's rust.' !

YOu'LL GeT A KiCk Outta ThIs

MERRY CHRISTMAS From Jahlaune:!!

Type in any Christmas song and see what the little puppets do. Also, type in any non-Christmas song (zycie typed in Happy Birthday) and you'll get a kick out of the response. One of the funniest he typed in was Jingle Bell Rock... they forget the words half way through. HOW DO THEY COME UP WITH THIS
STUFF?
http://www.sundog.net/carolofthechins/flash/ca rd.swf

NEW OHIO ROLLER COASTER (humour)

NEW OHIO ROLLER COASTER

WOULD ANYONE LIKE TO TAKE A TRIP TO OHIO?

Last picture says it all...

Yep, enough said!

fish story (food for thought)

Fish Story (Photos by Pam Driver) Bill Driver, who lives in Wichita, KS, saw a ball bouncing around kind of strange in the lake and went to investigate. It turned out to be a flathead catfish who had obviously tried to swallow a basketball whichbecame stuck in its mouth!! The fish was totally exhausted from trying to dive, but unable to because the ball would always bring him back up to the surface. Bill tried numerous times to get the ball out, but was unsuccessful. He finally had his wife, Pam, cut the ball in order to deflate it and release the hungry catfish. You probably wouldn't have believed this, if you hadn't seen the following pictures...

Be kinder than necessary 'cause everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.

24 hours to live (humour)

Morris returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him that he has only 24 hours to live.
Given the prognosis, Morris asks his wife for sex.
Naturally, she agrees, so they make love.
About 6 hours later, the husband goes to his wife and says,
'Honey, you know I now have only 18 hours to live.
Could we please do it one more time?'
Of course, the wife agrees, and they do it again.
Later, as the man gets into bed, he looks at his watch
and realizes that he now has only 8 hours left.
He touches his wife's shoulder and asks,
'Honey, please... just one more time before I die.'
She says, 'Of course, Dear,' and they make love for the third time.
After this session, the wife rolls over and falls to sleep.
Morris, however, worried about his impending death, tosses and turns, until he's down to 4 more hours.
He taps his wife, who rouses. 'Honey, I have only 4 more hours.
Do you think we could...'
At this point the wife sits up and says, 'Listen Morris, enough is enough
I have to get up in the morning... you don't.'

Senior Humour

I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes (he is 92). We decided to grab a bite at the food court. I noticed he was watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, and blue. My dad kept staring at him. The teenager would look and find him staring every time.

When the teenager had had enough, he sarcastically asked, 'What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?'

Knowing my Dad, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke on his response, knowing he would have a good one, and in classic style he did not bat an eye in his response. 'Got drunk once, and had sex with a parrot. I was just wondering if you were my son.'

Random early morning thoughts,

I think I have discovered who my female closest is. i like that term closest because it describes those that are the closest to you. the only people in your life with enough power to hurt you because you are so endeared to them. Because you love them almost unconditonally.

Gabriel is my male closest. I cant think of any other dudes that I even want to be close too. I use to be like that with Sadiq back in the day. I still love him as far as love can go too. But in a natural brotherly way. I was thinking....Sadiq is the one dude that I could never ever get close too. Even tho we were there I cvalued his friendship wayy to much. Gomez and them still talk about that. I sometimes wonder if I was missing out...Probbly not. Sometimes, naw, most of the time friendship outlast sex. least in my world it does.

Probbly cause i dont really feel dudes that way that I trust enough of them. Trish has got to be my female closest. I call her my "thug a boo." remember that dvd that the Wynan brother put out in 2006 called "thug a boo" with d roc and all those crazy hood kids. I still got my copy so i brought it up to her house so we could eat icecream and 3 muskateers and watch movies. cuz thats what we do

Shes like the one girl if i was gonna have an affair and i was with a girl I would have it with her. That takes a damn nerve and makes no sense but thats the truth. I love her too much to want to marry her because that would be BS of the highest order. i dont knock brothers that are on the DL and marry I just cant love someone and deceive them.

I was looking at a picture of my ex wife and I realized the only thing I really misss was she could cook and I never had to cook nothing and she was fun to be with. But she was gay and sometimes didnt know how to talk to people even me. i say, when i sit and think of a way to fuck u up. Its time for us to split. But, I wonder if it had worked out what would my life be like now?

anyway, i popped in her crib at 1 am cuz Gabe went to work and its always like we havent seen each other for years even tho we were on the phone twice yesterday. She always makes me laugh she says...OK are we gonna do it here now on the bed or wait. And we laff cuz we went together in 7th grade for like 3 weeks and i quit her cause her hair was short or some crazy kidd reason and she threatened to have her brothers kick my azz. But she is my closest. Everybody should have a closest of each sex cause then all dimensions of your being are covered.

Since its snowing I havent even driven today. I hate driving anyway so I walked down to Kingston Ave to hang with my Thug A Boo and get my eat on. Supreme stopped by and u know that brother has really changed since he got knowledge of self. hes a godbody now ( five percent nation) and its all good. Divine,Sadiq, supreme and me use to run hard back in 2000 and then we all went to doing our own thing. I went to work, Divine got into "the life" way too deep. Messin with K. Mugler and that crew. he just ended up a total loser. I think hes on the island or upstate. Those Mugler kids are those ball kids the house of Mugler but the one he fell in love with is this booster. The punk can boost his ass off but he stays in jail and thats f up. When divine first told me i was like aight cause i knew the kid. I still have his digits and at one point I use to run with his partner Hubba until they pulled that grimy shit on me. Me and Tish was talking about that tonight. I still have a lot of stuff Hubba gave me. That negro could steal. B4 I know his skeeze we were at the plaza having a drink and he asked the lady to take our picture. The lady got up and while she was taking our picture that negro took 900 dollars out her bag and a credit card. I was like damn...But he is a loser for real cuz he is only out of prison maybe 43 days out of every 3 years! I saw him like a few months ago I turned my head cuz this is one that is not going to sit in anybodys jail.

I wonder how people can live with that revolving door syndrome in and out of jail. Bad thing is Hubba came from a good family when we was like 14 we use to steal his moms or my dads car and drive to the city and just hang out we would be back b4 5am cuz my dad woke up every morning at 5am and was out the house by 6. His mother is so nice too. Its sad. I never knew he was going to grow up and not wanna hold a job or get an education. Thats sad cuz with those skills he could have channeled his creativity into a great career doing something. I guess a career criminal is a career..who knows/

My dog is a trooper only dog on the block that just hangs lol. hes all up at trishs door trying to get in cuz he knows she makes him sauseges.

nothing really going on this morning. Gabe gets off from work 9am so i have company tho sleeping all day and imma chill.

i thank God that im conscience of who I am and where i fit in in this world. Finding yourself can be hard and being comfortable in your own skin can be harder. But, im glad im me. I do some fucked up shit sometimes but i can honestly say their is no solid reason for anyone to hate me.....less they are just haters lol