THE HUMOUROUS SIDES OF MARRIAGE

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?' 'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?' He yelled back, ' OHIO STATE ! ' And they say blondes are dumb..... ---------------------------------------------------------------- A couple is lying in bed. The man says, 'I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world..' The woman replies, 'I'll miss you........ ---------------------------- 'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,' Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?' 'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied. ------------------------------------------- Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man? A: A rumor ------------------------------------------- Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; and Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Q: Why do little boys whine? A: They are practicing to be men. -------------------------------------------------- Q: What do you call a handcuffed man? A: Trustworthy.. --------------------------------------------- Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough. ------------------------------------------ Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet? A: It helps them remember which end to wipe.. ------------------------------------------- Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail? A: Rename the email folder 'Instruction Manuals'